No Clean Slate
Dear Strong Woman,
HOT TAKE: January 1st is not a clean slate.
If you’ve subscribed to some version of “new year, new me” as of midnight tonight, please consider the following before the ball drops: starting over does not mean you are starting at ground zero.
If you’ve got a PhD in judgment and self-loathing (as we’ve all been trained and manipulated to have), then you’ve got thoughts running through the back of your mind like…
Oh, you’re gonna give this a shot again? You really think this time is going to be different? Stop kidding yourself, you know you’re destined to be [insert negative adjective here]. Why bother? You know you’re gonna screw it up by the end of the week anyway.
Remember, fear (and it’s cousins - guilt, shame, imposter syndrome) will only collect evidence to support its case.
Whatever “new” thing you’re embracing, notice how you are going into it with a bajillion lessons learned. Skills that have been refined again and again and again. Warrior blood in those veins because - hello! - you’ve made it to this very moment. Make a case for your awesomeness and how this new endeavor in front of you is bound to succeed, not fail.
We’ve been trained that our happiness is tied up in others being happy with us, and that the best way to make that happen is to stay small and keep out of the way. Unfortunately, it puts all of our power in someone else’s hands.
So take your power back, my friend. Your task today is to get super braggy and list all the things that make you awesome. This can be qualities about you and also things you’ve accomplished. Get a friend to help you think of things. (Trust me — we suck at this.) I suggest putting each on a sticky note, fold ‘em up, and put them in a jar. Pull one out each day, each moment when you need to reconnect to your power, and especially before any action connect to this new adventure.
My wish for the world is that 2023 is the year we all come home to ourselves. The year we celebrate the gift of our uniqueness as it exists here and now. The year we break up with old patterns that reinforce generational trauma. The year we love ourselves first. The year we heal. The year we live full, delicious lives. The year of inner peace as the norm, not the ever-moving goal post.
The evidence of how amazing you are is there to you choose to see it. it isn’t arrogance to acknowledge it.
It’s your birthright.
Claim it.
